Lover of God, wife, mother, British missionary in Peru... click here to learn more about Anna and this blog and how it can serve you.

10 Things I have Learned about Marriage - by Mark Burgess

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Today I get to share a few top tips on marriage from Mark, my awesome other-half! I asked Mark to contribute, because he has some wise things to say about the topic, and because I wanted you to hear from my husband on this month too! He has some really practical things to say, so read on... 

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1. The secret to marriage: Communication. When we don't talk and say what is going on inside the marriage suffers.

2. It is not what I do for Anna but the attitude that goes with the act that is more important. If it is good she feels loved, if it is bad she doesn't value the sacrifice I have made. 

3. Sex is best when I put my wife's desires and wants first. 

4. Love is a decision not a feeling.  It is a decision which needs to be made most days, even when I am feeling loved and in connection with Anna.  

5. Listening to Anna with undivided attention (and not attached to an electrical item) is essential if I want a happy life!

6. It’s all about the little things that don’t seem like anything, but they all add up – a quick hug and kiss, putting out the bin without being asked, taking the boys out for the afternoon. 

7. Putting Anna first (after the Lord) isn't always my first thought but when I do it, it is always the best thing to do.

8. God can speak through Anna and sometimes bring direction through her.   This is not Anna undermining my leadership of the family. My job as head of the household is not to come up with all the ideas but to recognise and implement the ideas that come from God. The humbler I am the more God can speak through Anna to me and my pride will not hinder me. 

9. Having the last word or being right is not winning. If there is any type of winning in marriage, the first person to ask for forgiveness 'wins'.

10. Spending time with God is the best thing I can do for my marriage and for Anna.  The better my relationship is with God, the better our marriage is.  

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Mark is passionate about church planting, leadership and training up the next generation.  He enjoys war, sci-fi fantasy and spy films, as well as team sport. (He is sad to no longer get the opportunity to play rugby here in Peru.) He has been married to Anna for 10 years this July and honestly feels that marriage really is like fine wine.  

Running Away by Helen Askew

Battles in the bedroom

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